When I Met Pure Sunshine

Yesterday, a beautiful woman went home to be with the Lord. Her name was Sydney. I met her once and it was like meeting pure sunshine. And when I met her, while I hadn't known her name before that moment, I knew exactly who she was as I had watched her for sometime.

See, I am new to this place. It was her home. And while I didn't know who she was, or what was ravaging her body, I watched her from afar each Sunday as her church family individually came to check on her throughout the service. And each time, the tables were turned as she became the counselor, the cheerleader, the sister, the friend. And the love that she lavished on her family in those moments was so abundant, that a shy, new girl was captivated each Sunday from the sidelines watching.

In late July, I had my chance meeting with her. I arrived late for church, with my much needed Starbucks in hand, looking for my friend who had saved me a seat. Sitting on the other side of her was the sunshine I had been watching since February when I first noticed her, and true to form, she was just as bright and warm and larger than life as she had seemed. It was obvious she had been dealing with a lot that morning, but all of the world was tossed to the side as she gave me one of the warmest welcomes I have ever experienced.

That was my first and my last encounter with Sydney. But as I watch the tears fall on Facebook from those who knew and loved her, I am struck with sadness for the person I wish I would have known. I am in awe of the evident impact she had on so many people.

This is the moment where words are never adequate. When you hold tightly to a loved one and the embrace is not long enough. As Christians, we have hope knowing that she is healed and with Jesus. As humans that have only experienced this earth, our hearts ache for our beloved. It is where the heart and the mind disconnect.

Anne Lamott once wrote, "You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp."

There are many broken hearts this week. But maybe, part of dancing with a limp is also living out the legacy that Sydney left behind. I was allowed a small glimpse into an amazing life. But in one brief encounter, I wanted to be more gracious and welcoming to others. I wanted to be less shy so that I could love others more extravagantly. I wanted to let go of the world and be more in the moment. All of this, from a few mere moments of conversation with Sunshine. Imagine if we all stepped forward with her lessons and lived out her legacy.